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Momma’s of little girls…

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I’m not one. I have 4 surviving children….all boys! However, this time of year I shop for my niece. She is 6 and she lives in Florida. She is my brother’s daughter…adopted from China. Her name is Makayla. She has a birthday in November and then of course there is Christmas.

Her birthday this year was easy….she was here for Thanksgiving and I gave her a china tea set and an apron that had been my Mom’s and then mine. It has a farm theme….there is a question there someplace for my mother 🙂 Makayla loves the farm. She loves to cook with me and I always wear an apron in the kitchen…so now we can dress alike.

*From this point on proceed with caution…rant in progress!*

I spent some time in Toys R Us looking for something wonderful for Makayla….I spent a lot of time. I feel sorry for Mommas of girls…so little to choose from. I haven’t been in a Toys R Us for a long time and I didn’t look at little girl things when I was there. This time I did and I was shocked. The sexualization of toys for little girls grieved my heart.

I saw some dolls (?) called Bratz….they looked like their name. Barbie on steroids. I saw lots of “movie star” things…right….I want my niece to imitate Paris Hilton???? Even Polly Pocket (my boys loved those when they were little) looked a bit over the top. What happened to sweet and innocent? Why do we want our 5 year olds to desire to bare it all? Why are we presenting them with the big bust, tiny waist, round hips, big lips, Cleopatra eyes and revealing clothes….at FIVE???? What message are they trying to sell your daughters…my niece? I was utterly disgusted!

There was a small smattering of lifelike baby dolls, some very expensive PLASTIC ktichen equipment (non-working of course!) and the usual Disney fairy/princess stuff. I saw very few educational items directed towards girls, very little to support being a Mommy…however if you want to encourage your daughter to walk the streets when she grows up….shop at Toys R Us! I hope that other stores have a better selection than ours…I was afraid to even look in the clothing section! How do you ladies do this? Where do you shop?

So…I left without making a purchase. I bought Makayla a real rolling pin of her very own, some real cookie cutters, a spatula, a Christmas dishtowel and some sprinkles to go with the sugar cookie mix I am sending. I hope she will enjoy an afternoon in the kitchen with her Mommy baking cookies – two gifts in one really 🙂

I am thankful I have boys….compared to you Momma’s of little girls, I have it easy!

Comments

15 responses to “Momma’s of little girls…”

  1. Patty Day Avatar
    Patty Day

    I share your pain about the Bratz dolls. My first Barbie was lovely; she had a grey flannel skirt and a lovely coral twin set with pearl buttons. With Barbie, it was all about the clothes, and there are some wonderful things out there.Also, we used to make clothes for our Barbies. I learned to sew that way, and while I was never very good at it, I learned a few useful skills. My aunt would knit clothes for my Barbies, too.I don’t wish to be crude, but Bratz dolls look as if they are on the stroll, and I find this appalling. There are baby dolls that are lovely, but, as you pointed out, expensive. There is a site online called Gooseberry Patch, and they have real, working kitchen tools for small children. They also have aprons, including Mommy and Me aprons. They even have cookbooks for kids. Have a very wonderful holiday. I enjoy your site very much. (I’m a City Girl from Southern California.)

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  2. TNfarmgirl Avatar
    TNfarmgirl

    Hi Patty,Thanks so much for taking the time to tell me about Gooseberry patch, I’ll check them out for next year. I know that if Grandma were alive and was shown a Bratz doll…her only word would be Hussy!Merry Christmas!Cheri

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  3. Melanie Avatar
    Melanie

    My baby girl is only 15 mths.At this point we are not affected.But I have been looking around at alternatives for her. Stores do not carry appropriate items for her or any other girl.I am disgusted by the girl items.The problem is christians are buying these and thinking this is cute and wonder why there children are sassy. I actually shop for my boys online or in the camping hunting section of a store. They love real stuff.They don’t even hunt which they would love to do but daddy does not know how and they enjoy camping and real man tools.Which daddy can help in that department. If you all know of a good christiam hunter send them my way, my husband would be glad and so would my boys. Merry Christmas,Melanie

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  4. TNfarmgirl Avatar
    TNfarmgirl

    Hi Melanie,I can’t understand why Christian women would buy these things….do we desire to fit in to the point that we would expose our children to this garbage? If people would stop buying it then they wouldn’t produce it….time to bring back hope chests and fill them with useful things that encourage little girls to fulfill the highest calling…motherhood!Merry Christmas,Cheri

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  5. Denise Avatar
    Denise

    Hi Cheri,Your assessment of what’s available for girls is right on. I just recently lamented that it’s easier shopping for clothing for our twelve-year-old son than it is for his three sisters. Our oldest girl is seventeen and when she was little there were still pretty little girl clothes available. Fortunately, many of these have been passed down to her younger sisters (ages 7 & 9). I’ll tell you that modesty has to be cultivated from the earliest age. Just in simple ways, not lectures etc. What your children are exposed to as they’re growing up makes a big difference. Thankfully, our oldest is very much a lady and it’s just a natural part of her. The younger ones are following in her steps, although, because they came after their brother we sometimes have the little tomboy syndrome. 🙂 As for gift giving for little girls, there are always the cooking items such as you mentioned, and we have purchased some things from Gooseberry Patch and been pleased with them. The aprons we bought are of a nice quality. Crafts are a nice idea too, such as a simple needlepoint kit for beginners. Art supplies is another idea. Good baby dolls are ususally found at independent specialty toy stores, but you pay a good penny for them. Rag dolls are a great alternative. A special keepsake cookbook at an appropriate age is a nice idea. We enjoy fishing as a family, so even for our girls a fishing pole makes a nice gift. 🙂 It sure beats Barbie and Bratz.Merry Christmas~Denise

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  6. robin Avatar
    robin

    This year I shopped at a hobbie store and I found wonderful things, like art, all different crafts,and different sewing kits. There was one that taught girls how to knit and crochet. I had a fun time shopping for them at this store.

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  7. TNfarmgirl Avatar
    TNfarmgirl

    Denise,Thanks for some great ideas! I am filing your post away for next year :)CheriRobin,You also gave some great ideas…I’ll hang onto your post to remind me next year. Thank you!Cheri

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  8. Lynn Avatar
    Lynn

    Hi cheri,I don’t have girls, but enjoy looking at girl things for gifts. When you have time, check out http://www.marmeedear.com . She has some neat things, and even a great cookbook for boys!

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  9. Andrea Avatar
    Andrea

    You probably don’t have a Hobby Lobby (www.hobbylobby.com) near by, do you? They are 100x better than Michaels Craft Stores!…And owned by a very conservative Christian family here in Oklahoma!!!(HUGE plus in my opinion!) Their online shopping site is under a different name http://www.craftsetc.comMy friend’s little girl is 7 and LOVES anything craft/scrapbook related from Hobby Lobby!I don’t know exactly where you live, but I googled Hobby Lobby in TN (go to one if you ever have a chance!!!):KnoxvilleFranklinMadisonGermantownCookvilleMemphisClarksvilleMurfreesboroHixsonCollierville

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  10. TNfarmgirl Avatar
    TNfarmgirl

    Hi Andrea,Thanks so much…they just built one about 30 minutes from here…I’ll check it out :)Merry Christmas,Cheri

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  11. Denise Avatar
    Denise

    I have another gift idea for you. If a Christmas tree is part of your niece’s celebration a special ornament would make a nice gift. We started the tradition of giving each of our children an ornament for Christmas when our first one came along. Each year they get a special ornament, something specific to them, something that reflects their intersts or hobbies or a milestone from that year. Someday when they marry and move to their own homes they will each have a nice collection of ornaments (and the memories to go along with them) for their own trees.We laugh about the fact that when they’re all grown and have homes of their own, Dad and Mom’s tree will be bare — so they say they’ll reverse the tradition then, and give us an ornament each year. 🙂

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  12. TNfarmgirl Avatar
    TNfarmgirl

    Denise,This is a great idea! I have done this for all my boys since they were born…not sure why I never thought to do that for my niece but I will start the tradition next year. I also buy an ornament for me each year so that my tree won’t be naked when the boys leave :)Blessings,Cheri

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  13. Mary Ellen Avatar
    Mary Ellen

    Resisting the Bratz empire is no easy task…especially with public school in the picture but we have managed. Lots of honest talk about the image and the name and it helps to have three very beautiful, godly, modest, teenage neices to look up to:) We do have Barbie (the traditional not the one that looks like Bratz or My Scene)although my DD is into the vet, horse, and home related accessories that accompany her. We do have trouble wardrobing her these days as we use the same criteria for her as for the rest of the fam. We were able to find a “little” girl (19 now) who had saved all her stuff and got tons of cute “retro” outfits for T this Christmas. Some classic girl gifts we have loved: stuffed animals, cash register, jump rope, sidewalk chalk, bubbles, craft kits (pottery, weaving, beads etc.),dress up clothes, art supplies, rag dolls, board games, computer games,play doh, tea sets, hair accessories, girlie sleeping bag, wooden playfood, puzzles, music player with microphone, and books. Turtle’s Nest next to Outback Steakhouse has a much better selection of toys for boys and girls in my opinion. Merry Christmas to you and yours:)

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  14. TNfarmgirl Avatar
    TNfarmgirl

    Hi Mary Ellen, I agree T has wonderful role models and I have been so impressed with how you always have T dressed! I know it isn’t an easy task – perhaps we will all need to take up sewing 🙂 I love your suggestions for my niece also…I’ll file your email away with the others for next year…thank you! I’ll check out the Turtle’s Nest too – never noticed it before.Merry Christmas!

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  15. Jeannie Avatar
    Jeannie

    I’m normally a lurker here but had to comment since you have hit on one of my pet peeves. It’s really very difficult now to raise a girl to be a decent lady… especially taking into consideration that I was not raised to be one myself. From the clothing that is most affordable and readily available to the trashy toys and books every signal sent to a girl child now is that they are to be objectified and be okay with that. I’m so thankful that while my daughter was young some of the ladies in our church were able to help me learn to be a good mommy and raise her right. Thrift stores are our main clothing source, and I’m thrilled many times to find very high quality clothing that is both modest and affordable for my daughter. Gifts for her have not been hard to find it’s just a matter of not looking in the “normal” places. Years ago I bought a nice recipe book, the three ring binder type, and every gift giving occasion she gets one of our oldest and most favorite recipes printed out on a nice pretty piece of paper and laminated to go in her recipe book… then we make that recipe together. There are some good books for young ladies too, the ‘Sisters in Time’ series appears promising and always there are the Little House books. It is discouraging though that we must make such efforts to avoid the things that no child should be taught to play with. Well, I’m sure that’s more than enough rambling from here! May you and your family have a wonderful Christmas and a blessed New Year.

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